Chloe, bo-boey, Banana-fana fo-foey, Chloe!

Chloe’s Soft Serve Fruit is a mundane concept that is surprisingly unique and quite delicious! While on the search for vegan ice cream places I’d never tried before, I came across Chloe’s (no relation to byChloe.) They don’t claim to be an all-vegan establishment, as they do offer both milk and milk-alternative options, but the vegan options are abundant!

I must admit, I don’t think I would have noticed Chloe’s by Union Square in NYC, or ever considered going into the place if I didn’t see them on the interwebs. Why, you ask? Honestly, fruit soft serve sounds rather uninteresting. I can eat fruit anytime, or I can have a New York City celebrity (i.e. Mark Ruffalo whom I saw on the streets recently. Don’t mind my name-dropping, I’m just an important person…) chew my fruit and regurgitate it into a cup for me like I am a baby dove and Mark Ruffalo is my big mama dove.


However, they offer more than chewed-fruit. There’s peanut butter and chocolate and waffles and coconut and fruit that hasn’t been chewed!


The unfortunate thing about my visit to Chloe’s was the lack of adventure. No weirdos, no embarrassment…. I arrived, ate, and left like a grown-up. Maybe I’m maturing. Maybe I finally hit puberty. Or maybe no one else heard or smelled my banana burp.

The menu here is pretty impressive. Once again, though, there were too many varieties! There were no similar options or things I could switch and move to perfection. I was scared and confused by the large menu on the wall. I just like to have a small, organized menu from where I can pick and choose what will make my taste buds and tummy content. The two dudes working behind the counter weren’t helpful, either. They were both giving out sample tastes of fruit to people. These college girls would come in and act like dark chocolate was some bizarre and mysterious flavour. “huh. I wonder what vanilla tastes like…. And, what about strarberry? Starelly? Warbelly? *flustered* We don’t have that where I come from in Missouri.”


I felt ignored and unimportant. Don’t you know who I am!? Mark Ruffalo chews my food for me!

Fortunately, no thanks to the workers, I was able to make heads and tails out of the menu and finally select a sundae. They called it: Crunchy Salty– Banana & Dark Chocolate Soft Serve Fruit, Banana, Pretzels, Warm Natural Peanut Butter, Melted Chocolate

ice cream2

It’s hard for me to judge this little fella. First of all: Peanut Butter. So, it is difficult for me to say anything negative about it. But, their fatal mistake was: Banana soft serve. Actually, that was my bad. If I had been any wiser, I would have chosen dark chocolate for this concoction. The banana soft serve is clearly made from frozen bananas. As we all know, frozen bananas, much like their overripe counterparts, are way too sweet. Too sweet for me, at least. Since fish can be too fishy, I’ll say that frozen banana is too banana-y. The banana slices had that covered, and I didn’t want more. Fortunately, the peanut butter, although definitely not warm, was still marvelous, and the chocolate and pretzel were on point. Sweet and Salty are always the solution to life’s problems. Especially since the salty wasn’t over-the-top. Actually, looking back at what they claim the ingredients were, I think they gave me chocolate chips instead of chocolate soft serve. I feel ripped off! That probably would have been a much better balance. I feel cheated.

In the end, though, for the $6.50 price and the filling serving of low-calorie snackage, it was good. Flavour could have been more satisfying, but I had a nice experience at Chloe’s. I’ll be going back to try this “Veniller” flavour of which they speak.

Tune in next time when I review something else!

Rating: 7/10 unicorn hugs

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